#Comedy #Humour: “I AINT AVING THAT”
by Author Martin Rogers
Ever waited in all day for a plumber who never turned up? Been given a parking ticket you shouldn’t have received?
Had nightmares trying to return some faulty goods? – then this is the book for you!
“I Ain’t ‘Aving That” is the hilarious account of one man’s dogged life-long fight against the system.
It’s part novel, part autobiography – overflowing with homespun philosophy – and a guide for survival in the big city.
Laced with street lore and an infectious sense of impishness and determined refusal to be done down, “I Ain’t ‘Aving That“ shows how to get sweet revenge for life’s irritating little injustices.
As you recognise familiar frustrating situations it will raise a guaranteed smile at the turn of every page and sometimes you’ll laugh aloud at the antics of its author and protagonist, Martin Rogers – one-time milk boy, photocopier engineer, salesman, computer programmer, driving instructor, press photographer and now folk hero.
Stubborn, irreverent, resourceful, blessed with an infectious sense of humour, he’s Superman with holes in his socks.
The setting is London but could be any metropolis, anywhere, any time. Readers will empathise with situations that reflect their own life experience while, as the saga unfolds, facing the uncomfortable truth that while we are all victims of the bureaucrats and jobsworths whose sole life mission seems to be to do us down, we are at times ourselves guilty of being the perpetrators.
Odds are, the plumber who didn't turn up got a parking ticket he did not deserve; the stroppy shop assistant who didn’t want to exchange those faulty goods found herself locked into an endless call centre queue.
Martin Rogers offers a simple philosophy to help you cope. It's fitting that his 10 Commandments for successful complaining kicks off with: “1. Find something to complain about… “
40 something, twice married, twice divorced, six kids. Martin Rogers is a product of his generation. Ducking and diving, he’s been a messenger boy, has delivered milk, worked as a photocopier engineer, sold fruit and veg door to door, cleaned windows, laid bricks and been a driving instructor but mostly he has spent his time simply trying to survive all the pitfalls of modern life. Like most of us, Martin stumbles from minor disaster to major crisis, but with one great difference: he simply will not lay down and be kicked. He's lived in squats and owned his own home, driven old bangers and gleaming showroom gems, been in and out of work and in and out of love.
South London born and raised, Martin suffers everything that the city, the suburbs and beyond can throw at him, clashing with council officials and parking wardens, policemen and shop managers, the family and mere passers-by, but he's the stuff of their nightmares for when the system conspires against him, his hackles raise and he growls simply: "I ain't 'aving that!"
He'll fight his own case through the courts, start a picket line or raise a petition where needed, and spend hours writing letters or on the phone. But, whatever, he'll never be fobbed off.
So many things go wrong for the man that you could no way call him a winner. But one thing's even more certain: he isn't one of life's losers either. Turning survival into an art form, he might lose his rag but never his cool and while he might not always emerge on top, Martin's always got a great yarn to spin.
Disaster stalks him; when things go wrong he's usually at the receiving end but he never becomes a victim. There's a bit of Martin in all of us. So this is his story.